Lost returns – up in smoke
What can you say about the train wreck suckfest that has become lost? I guess I can only judge each episode now by how many times I laugh. I think I laughed about 9 times. The first laugh was when Sawyer was able to dodge machine gun fire by running beside a picket fence. Meanwhile they are sniping other people with one shot. By the way who the hell were the first 2 people shot? Anyone? The best laugh of the night was when the beloved smoke monster made its triumphant return! Oh the joy of CGI smoke!
Then of course we had the flash-something of ben. So if we have had a flash forward already, then a flash back before that one, but still in the future, what is that? A flash-intermediate? I don’t know, but this bourne identity ripoff was completely lame. I just don’t buy Ben as this super agent character.
9.0 on the suck meter and this episode has made me too weary to even drag out the suck meter image.
Written by on April 25th, 2008 with
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0 Laughs from me.
I don’t get it.
How did they go from “castaways stuck on a messed up island” to boreass mind games between a wanna be spy and a wanna-be-connery?
Dunno
Don’t care.
Here is where I would normally say “kill the writers”
HOWEVER, Brian K Vaughn is one of the two writers.
For those that don’t know him, Vaughn is a genius.
Check out his graphic novels Ex Machina, The Runaways, The Hood, Y The Last Man. He writes great stuff.
So there is no way this is on him.
This is more like George Lucas making fools out of Ewan McGregor, Samuel L Jackon, Liam Neeson and Nathalie Portman.
This is JJ Abrams Being the worst dickwad this world has ever known.
For the first time, I think I’m completely cured of this show.
It’s beyond garbage now. It’s really just wasteful.
A waste of time, energy, and probably makes us dumber just by watching it.
Don’t think I’ll be back, so once again, thanks for the laughs.
It was violent for the sake of violence, ridiculous, and a waste of the DVR space I used to record it. I’m done with this series, and I suspect ABC wishes it was too.
That was painful. At the end, as Ben left the penthouse, I wondered how we’re going to be able to survive two more years of this??? The story is now, officially, completely out of control, spiraling into preposterous nonsense. I admit loving the atmosphere of the island, but now? Tikrit? London? New York? Los Angeles? Why not just have Ben be a “jumper” and intrude all over the globe? Why on earth didn’t Sayid just kill him in the hatch way back when there was still some faint hope for the show? Good question above regarding those anonymous shooting victims? Who were they? Where’d they come from? Oh yeah, landing party extras, someone to be killed so Sawyer can worry. It’s so stupid. Sorry about Brian K Vaughn, but nobody involved with this show is a genius. Still, I can’t wait for next week’s episode: The Appendectomy! I’m not sure which is worse now, the tedium of pointless mystery, or the idiotic shoot ‘em up/spy game. Is it stating the obvious to suggest that in a Lost Production/Writers room somewhere there is a lot of weed being smoked? Maybe crack?
oh yeah well fuck you asshole!
Hi again everybody, I’m not sure whether you remember me from the last few seasons. I am probably most famous (or infamous as it were) for dreaming up the theory that the Others are all gay. I managed to avoid watching Lost for the first eight episodes, but then I heard somewhere that there was some killer episode with Desmond and time travel and “Lost was back!” Regrettably, that was enough to prod me to watch the season 4 episodes on ABC.com and damn, what a mistake! I guess I have to give the producers credit for taking something that seemingly couldn’t get any worse, and yet they did somehow succeed in doing just that.
In retrospect, I now understand the opening scene of the season — Hurley (or “Hugo” as now everyone calls him for some unexplained reason) ramming his hot rod into a pile of mangos or papayas or whatever they were. That big stack of fruit represented the Lost audience, and the car symbolized the Lost writers, producers, and other retinue blasting through all the collective goodwill that we once had for the show — that is how they view us — a big stack of mangos.
The most entertaining part of viewing the episodes on ABC.com was to note the various advertisers who placed their web-commercials there. For instance, there was an Excederin ad — damn, I sure need a lot of that while watching that headache inducing program. Also, there was a commercial for Band Aid which did seem very apt, given that I was tempted several times to stab myself as I watched Lost. Best of all was some advertising for something called “Bene-Fiber” which would be helpful to get through an episode of Lost for pretty obvious reasons. But a question did occur to me, is a laxative agent more beneficial to the constipated Lost viewer or possibly to the Lost producers who have filled themselves up with so much utter crap that they need a Dharma submarine sized dosage of “Bene-Fiber” to properly bring about a general voiding of their overfilling bowels?
Anyway, this episode turned out to be just what I expected — horrible and insulting to my intelligence. The thing that caught my interest most was the game of Risk that Sawyer, Hurley, and Ben were playing at the beginning. I got past the proverbial misdirection they pulled at the outset, making us think Hurley and Sawyer were discussing something important and not just a board game. But when Locke came in and Ben freaked out over the impeding assault by Dharma/Widmore special forces, I was really disappointed that we would not get to see how the game of Risk would turn out! Watching an hour of those guys playing Risk would have been much more entertaining than sitting through Benjamin Powers, International Man of Mystery, traipsing around the Middle East to fulfill some non-sensical vendetta. And yes, Hurley is correct, Australia is the key continent to control at the start of the game, but, in my experience, the player who captures Australia rarely wins the game — he only assures himself second place. And in a game involving only three players, second place is not that impressive. Regardless, if I do continue to watch Lost, I will go back to the webcasts on ABC.com and at least glean some entertainment value from the commercials.
What an absurd post. Tommyj6168, do you know nothing, sir? Australia always wins in the game of Risk, even with only three players. The whole of the episode hinges on this simple fact and probably explains why you can’t enjoy the brilliant writing of this excellent show. I suggest you play this game again, perhaps following the rules this time, and then you will recognize that the writing is sheer genius – GENIUS! – although your plebeian mind will never comprehend its subtle nuance utilized through metaphoric allusions and foreshadowing.
Perhaps the writers are correct to think of viewers like yourself as a bucket of mangoes if they can’t appreciate the sheer brilliance of writing that requires a bunch of no name-extras to die to establish a hopeless situation from which the good guys can only be saved though a hand-of-god resolution via a magical entity whilst everyone stands around watching. Do you think any hack could write something like that? For shame.
Thank you for putting me in my deserved place, how dare I question that unrivaled genius of the creative minds behind Lost? I am sure they ran a computer simulation of millions of games of Risk and took into account every possible permutation before they committed to allowing Hugo to speak the mind bogglingly profound lines: “Dude, Australia is like the key to the whole game.” I apologize for pretending to grasp the genius behind Lost. People like me just need to accept our meager stations in life and resist the temptation to criticize the superior work of others — and it the process, making complete and total asses of ourselves. I will now post this message at the Fuselage so that the maginficent intellects over there understand that small minds like my own will never truly get Lost.
Wow, that episode was freaking awesome.
Look at all the haters. I pity you
Wow, what a brilliant commentary. Are you in 2nd or third grade?
You would rather I gave you an essay about how awesome this episode was?
Absolutely! That would at least show some rudimentary intelligence and give us more reason to lay into you, but this site has always tolerate dissenters, unlike the fan-boy sites that you probably frequent, that toss any opposing view. Show some balls and make real comments.
Why would I do that? Last time I did that, I was told to get out of my mothers basement and get some fresh air. So I think i’ll skip
Your mother’s basement is where your balls must be then. Do as you wish.
Hey guys, dont stop!! This is great
OK, I’ve got to admit, I liked the epi. Pretty much from start to finish. Perhaps my standards have just dropped so low that I can now enjoy LOST once again. But, whatever the case, I enjoyed it and am looking forward to next week.
what did you think JT?
Mrs. Meister
I think JT has abandoned us.
Hello everyone. My name is Boo, and I’m a recovering Lostaholic.
That’s not quite accurate. I’m fully recovered from my intense interest in this flaming piece of shit, however I’ve developed a wee bit of a drinking problem from having to knock back so many from my ‘Take a shot every time a female is attacked/kidnapped/dumbed down/making icky googly eyes at Jackass’ game. By the time they popped a cap in Alex I was three sheets to the wind. Did I mention there’s a requisite 3 shot minimum before the first 2 minutes are over? It’s either that or put on the slow kid helmet while repeatedly bashing myself in the forehead with Eko’s Jesus stick. I miss the Big Bad warlord. I wish he and Ana-LuLu with her hair trigger finger were around. Ben, Charlotte, Daniel, Miles, and Keamy would all be dead by now, alternating shot in the gut and clobbered over the head. Good times.
I’ve enjoyed this meeting. I have one more shot to do as I ponder the life and times of the Real Henry Gale – where was he headed when he crashed on the island? When did he crash? What would possess a Black man to take up hot air ballooning somewhere over the Pacific? And most importantly, how do we get his wife to Craphole so she can put the beat down on Jackass, Kate, and Ben – 3 people who’s eyes I’d love to see sporked out and crushed by Smokey?
To sleep, perchance to dream….
I see that the Mrs. has already posted, but overall I rank this episode the best of the season which, admittedly, is not saying much at all, but, at least it was not boring. I found myself actually wanting it to continue instead of begging for it to end, for a change.
The good: Loved Alex getting shot and seeing Ben’s eyes bulge more than usual, Loved the smoke monster tearing up the commandos. Liked the time distortion stuff for once with the doc being dead, but not dead, etc.
The bad: Risk? are you kidding? Playing board games? The whole shoot up scene with Sawyer reminded me of a A-team episode where nobody ever gets shot but bullets are everywhere, or perhaps Commando…
The ugly: The beach scene with Kate smiling way to much, Jack whining and wincing and wailing his arms around but, as usual, doing nothing, and Good ole’ Benard the spy translating the morse code from the coconut shell and duct tape transmitter straight out of Gilligan’s island.
Overall I think this episode was better for one big reason – Jack and Kate (and Botox) were basically not in it. Which, is why next week’s epi will be extraordinarily sucky, since they are the main part of it.
Feh. Another substandard episode. Methinks that the writers are now just cashing paychecks while they amuse themselves with an ongoing game of “Who can come up with the most ridiculous plot-points?”
If Jack were to die a slow painful death from appendicitis, I would immediately send JJ Abrams a check for $100. Anybody else wanna chip in?
One interesting observation: Usually, at this time on a Friday morning, the Lost board at TWOP has around 26-30 pages of comments. And today? Only 14 pages!! Could the basement-dwellers finally be seeing the light? Doubtful. The fourth post of the thread is this little gem:
“So much happened in that episode that I think my head’s going to explode trying to process it all. I think I said “Oh my God!” at least ten times. Ben’s a badass! It’s the future! Nadia’s dead! Alex is dead! Claire’s house exploded! Ben controls the monster! Ben’s going to kill Penny! (I actually figured that out a little before he said it). OMG OMG OMG.
Plus, I cried. Plus, Ben actually looked pretty cute in the flashforwards. Plus…OMG.”
Frightening to think that people like this really do live and walk among us…
Wow! That excerpt was AWESOME! I, like, laughed so hard and OMG, Ben’s a weird little freak!
Only half the page count as usual? Very interesting… I suspect it’s the result of the “Great Purge” now in progress at TWoP. Dozens upon dozens have been banned (myself included), most likely those who posted too many negative comments and were labelled “haters” or “trolls”. So much for sparing the snark – TWoP is pretty much a fansite now. I could re-register, but I don’t think I will. I’m done with them.
ps. Also of interest: The three main founders of TWoP also left on March 11. There’s an announcement over in “Nuts and Bolts” in “Tech Issues”.
The only reason I haven’t been banned yet on TWOP is that I’ve stopped posting. After getting 2 warnings in 2 weeks for MILDLY negative posts, I decided that they can go fuck themselves. Apparently, that’s what they’re doing.
thats exactly the type of shit thats so ridiculous that its incomprehensible to me. i’ve actually started going to the fuselage to read the verbal circle jerk that takes place every morning after lost for some quality entertainment… but i’ll never understand how they take so much pleasure away from such crap
whats worse? the quote you took or this on i got from the fuselage… it was a response to a question someone asked about why the show is all of a sudden focusing on ben so much… “I see your point, but any annoyance at other characters going into the background is offset for me by the sheer awesome badassery of Ben. I love many of the old characters, but none of them are quite as COOL as our Benji! I think the writers know what a goldmine they have in Ben (and in Michael Emerson), and they’re struggling right now to find a balance between him and the show as we all fell in love with it.
That’s okay for now, because, as I have said, Ben is just SO ******* GOD DAMN INSANELY COOL. Of course I want to see things even out after a while, but I am convinced that this chapter will always be some of my favourite Lost material because of the ginormous amount of Ben”
Was Lost cancelled? Last night at 10 pm I seemed to have stumbled upon this new ABC show called “Ben!” It’s about some rat-faced secret agent with all sorts of supernatural powers.
Props to you for posting the best comment yet!
“Suddenly Ben” starring Michael Emerson, Brooke Shields and co-starring Kathy Griffin…
Make that “Suddenly Benson”, where Robert Guillaume, Inga and the rest of the crew take over the island and kill all the Losties, and I’m there.
ha! excellent…
I still don’t get how they can make Ben such a focus of the show and expect the fans to care about him when there has not been one iota of logical, sensical revalation about the motivation and beliefs of the others. Why do they live on a shithole island and some act normal and some act religiously fanatical like suicide bombers? Beyond this, its inexcusable that botox is not being shown being asked these questions, its pure artificiality that we don’t know more.Even if botox said “I was tricked to come to the island and then I realized I was stuck here with a weird cult”, that would go so far in affecting the context of the story and characters.
Sawyer was alternately caring and lookin’ real dangerous. Locke was still getting to the bottom of things if it takes him forever. Claire was still looking ohgoodlord. Not enough Claire. Ben controls the smoke monster. Sorry, no time to tell you how right now, because he has to sneak into the inner sanctum of the other most dangerous man on earth by bluffing his way pst a doorman and sticking a paperclip in an elevator keyhole. What – no French Poodle to get past by tossing a milkbone? Ben is shocked ’cause his daughter gets shot, and we’re supposed to be too, but that point got passed quite awhile ago. My reaction was “Yeah, whatever.” Pretty much my reaction to the whole show now. The ship’s doctor is dead. What are you talking about? He’s fine. Is someone lying? Is he one or the other or both? Tune in next week! Lost is BAAAAACK!! Or it’s dead. Or who cares. And sorry, but Brian K. Vaughn ain’t all that, anyway. Just give me half the show looking at Claire, and I won’t complain anymore. As much.
Yup, apparently Ben can sneak into some secret chamber attached to his cabin and push a magic button and out comes the smoke cloud to kill all of his enemies. But why didn’t he just go in there and activate smokey the moment Widmore’s Magnificent 7 showed up? Wouldn’t that have saved Alex? Oh yeah, they were playing by “rules” which presumably means “my daughter doesn’t get killed” but everyone else is fair game.
Hee hee, do get the Risk reference now? Ben and Widmore are really just playing their own macro version of the game and using the globe as their game board and the magical island represents Australia — “the key to the whole game” as Hugo would say. And goddaman it, why does Widmore have to be portrayed by the same dude who played Bradford Meade on Ugly Betty? Every time he appears, I keep expecting Wilhelmina Slater and her gay assistant to walk into the room and reveal her latest half baked plot to take over Mode magazine.
So yeah, Widmore “changed the rules” of Risk, I guess he sneaked in few extra army pieces on his turn and was able to wrest Kamchatka away from Ben. Naturally, Ben is steamed and is cashing in all his territory cards and massing up a “grand armee” to sweep across the board. I can hardly wait!
I’m so confused. I can’t say i understand what even happened. But it didn’t completely suck so I’ll try to watch it again and see if i can make sense of anything
I don’t even recognize this show anymore. You can seriously tell that they are making all of this up as they go along, not giving any thought to continuity. It’s all about trying to look clever and throw in obscure references (”playing by the rules”, weird writing on the wall, etc) When the phone rang and the voice said “14F” I just knew the fan boys would be mentally masturbating over it for the next month.
Nothing that is going on right now relates to anything that happened in Season 1 or even Season 2 for that matter. Take it to the bank: you could’ve skipped this episode and not missed a thing. We already knew Sayid was going to work with Ben, we already knew the Widmore people had no intention of rescuing the Losties, we already knew Ben’s daughter had a nose job. And on…and on.
Are we seriously…SERIOUSLY!?!?!…going to have an emergency fucking appendectomy episode next week?!?!! Seriously. SERIOUSLY!?!?!?
If “Jump The Shark” describes when a show has finally become derailed (which Lost did many moons ago), then “Yank The Spleen” should be the term we use for when a show bends over and diarrhea-spray-craps right in the audience’s face.
That’s what next week’s episode will be. A heroin addict’s street corner runny shitfest.
LOL, you guys have such way with words. It was worth being dragged into the Lost debacle just to have found this site and read your comments! The writers should be fired and hire you folks.
I love how Daniel lied to cover up a message that made no sense with an even worse lie that would have backfired on him come morning when there was no chopper back; but apparently it worked cause it struck a chord in jacks innards – I thought he was about to toss chunks and/or cry and then it became all too obvious we were in for another emergency medical procedure. Maybe the doctor w/ the slit throat who is still alive at the same time is going to come and perform the procedure? If the helicopter can’t fly the course w/o time warping then the smoke monster could always carry him in from the ship on demand
one more thing… I liked it when Sayid was not naive. He’s gone from being the torturing interrogator to being Ben’s unknowing and willing puppet.
…
…
Locke referred to smokey jenkins as ‘the smoke monster’. Has that ever been said? What were they calling it before? It sounded so out of place.
no, it’s another lame device to use popularized terms created by ‘fans’ to make the show seem more…interactive…? this apparently counts as clever writing.
they also did this by [incredibly and unbelieveably] calling the others ‘the others’ !!!!!! (e.g. earlier this season juliet actually referred to herself as an Other…as in, “it’s not easy being an Other”…wtf?!)
I thought that was a funny line.
The “Others” were named that by Rousseau, not the fans. But Juliet was aware of herself being referred to as an “Other”.
So sorry, I think the show sucks as much as anyone else, but I remember THAT specific line making me laugh. And not at, but with.
Mrs. Meister
wow…no, i’m sorry for you that you remember that from…season 1? wow…
Sorry for what, that I have a memory? For a couple epis it was ‘THE mystery’. Rousseau said “the Others are coming. There are only 2 choices, hide or die” …or something like that.
Is it coming back to you now?
Mrs. Meister
I see forest, you see trees. this is but one example of the writers nabbing bits of names and references that have been popularized by fans or other media outlets.
you sour bitch.
I’d have to agree with Lmeister. I remember that, too, because that’s when Lost was interesting/creepy/mysterious. “The Others”. At that point, Rousseau was the only “other” they knew of so it wasn’t created by the fans. Rousseau was the one who first introduced to us that there were others on the island, and she refered to them as “The Others”. What a great show it was back then… before we knew it was going to stink to high heaven.
Gather round and I shall tell you a story, the greatest story ever told!
It all starts with a premature baby during his birth his mother tragically died.
Raised by an alcoholic father he was taken to a mysterious island at a young age.
In time he became a work man on the island but secretly he had struck a bargain with a group of people to wipe out his friend, family and coworkers.
After massacring everyone he rises to the position of leader of the island.
During this time he also because a secret agent with the multiple identities and a wedge of cash so thick you could use it to beat whales to death with.
Unsatisfied with this simple lot in life he kidnaps a young girl, and raises her as his own. Also he learns to communicate with Jacob, a strange being whom only he can communicate with.
Some time later he contracts spine cancer and after a spinal surgeon miraculously crashes onto his island he is cured and given a clean bill of health.
After surviving an invasion of his island, during which his daughter dies, he goes on a revenge mission against a billionaire (who he actually stole the island from originally). To do this he manages to learn how to time travel.
How will this epic end, watch lost to find out!
*Quick recap
Ben:
Premature baby->White trash->Janitor->Traitor->Island leader->Kidnapper->Mystic->Spy->Cancer patient->Survivalist->Mission of revenge->Time traveler
Got to say boys done good! Possible future occupations (based on things they haven’t ripped off yet or have only partially ripped off):
Darth Ben (star wars)
Beninator (terminator)
Benbo (rambo)
Benzilla (Godzilla)
Beneus (matrix)
Jesus Benst (the bible)
I mean can this show get any worse? They’ve even got Sawyer caring about Hurley now, since when did he care about anything other than himself and the contents of freckles panties. God I almost long for the days when everyone wondered ‘what is up with all these polar bears?’ instead we now have every cheesy second rate sci-fi plot device known to man strapped into a secret agent motif. For the love of god someone please find the nearest volcano and push JJ Abrams into it! The man just hasn’t done anything good on this show since he got to write the new star trek film (ask me he just can’t be bothered now he’s got film scripts to write).
Here endeth the rant!
brilliant! that was awesome
Brilliant Bob!
Serioulsy you’ve just sum up my thought over todays viewing of Lost!
This show is pretty much digging it’s own grave every single episode, cant wait till we finally see the final nail to the coffin for this crap soon.
Again, thanks Bob for that spot on remarks..
You guys sound like the fanboys you make fun of. “BRILLIANT! That critique of the show just made me WET MY PANTS! I can’t imagine these critizisms getting ANY BETTER, EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Bob’s post had more originality to it then LOST has had in 40 episodes. Pardon us if we give props to someone who can actually WRITE. God knows we’re not seeing any writing on this shit-fest abortion of a show.
I didn’t watch it. I have taken the cure. Like hopping on a freight train that won’t stop, sooner or later you have to jump off that sumbitch. When Desmond talked to Pennie on the telephone – that seemed as reasonable an ending as was ever going to appear. If they ever create a last episode I will watch that but for me its OVER, OVER, OVER. I knew after “Kingdom Hospital” to never start watching anymore of this crap, but they tricked me, they beguiled me, they drew me in, they set the hook, they started reeling me in but NO, I am off and back to the deep waters……………..
My biggest regret: Not googling “lost sucks” years ago.
I’ve been enjoying this site since TWOP shut down the Fiesta (enjoyed your comments there Latetothe…) and then they go and air this episode.
Until 11:00 last night I was in this to the bitter end. The premise of the story was good enough that I was going to see how it ended no matter how bad the story got.
Now the (mostly) boring story of the Lostaways on the mysterious(?) island seems to have faded to such a minor plot point that I just don’t care enough to make any plans to watch it or not watch it.
OTOH, kudos to Angry Sergeant Guy who said he was going to do something that made sense (kill Alex unless Ben surrendered) and then he ACTUALLY DID IT in the very same episode!
I don’t think that’s happened since Locke first opened up his knife case back on the beach and said he was going to go kill a pig.
this show sucks. refute that, faggots.
nobody will disagree with you here… except a few fanboys who keep lurking
Crappy TV. What’s new?
Scary, but it still beats a reality where a mulatto pretending to be black who is as status-quo as they come claiming to be an agent of change in a race with a Machiavellian she-male married to a hillbilly with designs of entitlement to fight for leadership against a senile hot-head fossil who had half his face replaced with skin from his ass. Now that’s absurd!
You can never win with TV americain.
lol, I
OMG, like that was the bestest episode ever! I was totally stoked about Ben and Sayeed, I mean OMG! This show is the greatest!
Holy Jesus, just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse. Although dramatically I thought this was one of the best episodes of the season, maybe since season 1, it totally dug a bigger hole. What freaking rules are Ben talking about? So now Ben’s going to kill Desmond’s Penny? Who is Ben? He’s some punk kid who grew up on an island, how can he be anything else? Time travel, traveling to Tunisia (that explains the polar bear I think). I’m so lost in the story I don’t know what the hell is going on anymore. Have the producers forgotten that Michael Emerson was only slated to do 5 episodes, and now he’s the main character? That shows precisely that they have had no idea what this show is about, how it will end, or what will even happen week to week. I’m not giving up but I would be mildly surprised if they answered any season 1 crap before the end, Season 1 basically has been forgotten now. And yes, Lost STILL SUCKS.
No…. you suck.
Another brilliant fanboy comment…
Whylostdoesn’thavetosuck.com:
Everybody reaches a saturation point. With Lost, crap has become the standard. I have resigned to it. We’ve all resisted the 50+ episodes of this show changing to something completely unrecognizable from what it was in the beginning, when it was full of light and promise. I think, for what the show is now, that episode was as good as an episode of Lost Season 4 could possibly be. There’s still horrible acting, cheesedick dialogue, and a complete vacuum in the logic department. It is what it is. I’ve finally found the intelligence switch in my brain, and I will shut it to “off” for an hour each Thursday night.
this episode was straight up GREAT. It was the R Kelly of episodes.
Does that mean it pissed all over an impressionable underage girl?
Through my secret ABC sources, I secured a copy of an alternative script for the scene between Ben and Widmore that took place near the end of the recent episode of Lost:
(Ben enters Widmore’s plush penthouse bedroom)
Widmore: Hey boy, how did you get in here?!
Ben: I cleverly conned your high paid doorman into thinking I knew a couple staying here and I just waltzed right in! You might want to consider locking your door in the future or at least using some of your unlimited wealth to hire a few bodyguards to protect you.
Widmore: Well, that doorman won’t be getting a tip tomorrow morning — and no boy (you see I call you “boy” because I am foreshadowing to the audience that I knew you when you were the Dharma janitor) I don’t need to lock the door or hire any bodyguards because, as we both fully realize, I CANNOT DIE I AM COMPLETELY INDESTRUCTIBLE!
Ben: That’s right, I forgot about that, so I guess the only way I can get back at you for killing my beloved Alexandra is to knock off your precious daughter Penelope.
Widmore: Oh give me a break boy, Alex was hardly your daughter — she was just some poor baby your kidnapped from the French woman who was roaming the island for 16 years, yet the bad ass survivalist who was so savvy that, in all her time on the island, she managed to avoid stumbling onto all the hatches (how many are there now — 10?), sonic fences, polar bears, smoke monsters, magic cabins, etc . . . and, worst of all, she had no clue where her daughter was all that time. And then when she was finally reunited with her long lost Alex, she had one semi-emotional scene with her, but she apparently wasn’t too pissed at you, because she practically became your buddy — until of course she was summarily knocked off by some sniper fire. Only shortly thereafter, Alex herself was snuffed out execution style right in front of you and you barely batted an eye. Which does makes sense, since you once committed an act of genocide when you gassed all of the Dharma people to death many years ago. Did I get all that right boy?
Ben: Yeah, pretty much (except that the genocide thing was your idea) but you have to admit that the writers very shrewdly tied up all the loose ends with the Rousseau/Alex story very neatly by just unceremoniously killing them both off and, at the same time, giving me a reason for acting out this “blood feud” with you which will presumably be the major plot line for the remainder of the series.
Widmore: Oh come on boy, I know why you’re really here, you don’t want to kill me, you are madly in love with me! You want to know how I put the big “D” in Dharma!
Ben (looking embarrassed): Uh well, if I can’t have Jack . . .
Widmore: Oh shut up boy and get in bed with me . . .
(Ben slides into bed with Widmore and the camera fades out as the audience sees violent rustling underneath the covers).
another brilliant analysis of Lost… this is #1 reason i love this site!
The number of fanboys waking up to the suckiticity of this show and coming to this site impresses me. The show must REALLY be insulting people’s intelligence now if even diehard fans are turning against it.
So the writers actually ran with that ridiculous “Penny’s father wants the island” bullshit that the fans thought up like, 2 years ago? I guess they run with whatever the mob wants, that is sort of the point of Lost. Of course, people often have no idea what they want, or they really don’t know what is good for them — e.g. our current President.
I wonder what else they will toss into the pot on this show. I’m guessing aliens pretty damn soon.
well were not coming here because “Lost sucks” we’re coming here to see the sorry excuses who post here and rip their logic apart, which I’ll agree is much more fun than actually discussing the episode at hand.
Okay, there is a lot of political bashing that goes on on this site and without exposing my own bent, I have some suggestions to make. There are less than eight months until the election, an election that will decide the next president of the United States .The person elected will be the president of all Americans, not just the Democrats or the Republicans.To show our solidarity as Americans (unless you happen to be Canadian or French), let’s all get together and show each other our support for the candidate of our choice. It’s time that we all came together, Democrats and Republicans alike.I f you support the policies and character of John McCain, please drive with your headlights on during the day.If you support Obama or Hillary, please drive with your headlights off at night.
Mrs. Meister
I like that idea.
Vote for Hillary, she’s going to pull us out of Iraq 120 days after taking office, which means I won’t even get 6 months in country before I come back. So if you care about us military types, vote for Hillary. Oh, don’t worry, once we’re out of Iraq, she’ll decimate the military like her husband did, and we’ll weaken as a country again and open ourselves for attack. But hey, we’ll be out of Iraq next summer.
CPT Preevyet on duty in Virginia
you sound kinda gay……
Attacked by who? Iran? Cuba?
I think other nations need to/are worrying about being attacked by the US, no?
You got that right, you communist pacifist. If you screw with the US, prepare to defend yourself. Or, in your case, ask for help, Frenchy.
I always love it when military retards try to speak their minds. Just keep voting against your own self-interests Sparky. It’s a great way to get ahead in life.
By the way, fantastic job your hero Dubya has done. You can personally thank him for the way the VA continues to screw over injured soldiers. Maybe you’ll actually get to see him in person if you get your legs blown off and he stages one last hospital photo-op. Remember to give a big thumbs-up to the camera while he pretends to care about you.
Given the fact we haven’t been attacked on our soil since 9-11-2001, I think W has done an excellent job. You’re welcome for your freedom, BTW. And, coincidentally, I believe the people in place at the VA have been there since way before W. But since you are an obvious fan of socialism (US Liberal), get used to the VA type stories for when HillaryCare comes around, it’s basically what we have now in the military/VA.
And as usual, the main tactic for a liberal is to call someone a name. Can’t you think of something more intelligent to say other than “retard”? And, BTW, that’s insulting to our developmentally challenged Americans.
So sit down and have a nice big cup of shut the fuck up.
News Flash: Dubya was in office on 9/11. The worst terrorist attack in U.S. history occurred on HIS watch, and he was warned about airplane attacks well in advance. Funny how right-wingers will never acknowledge this.
And yeah, only liberals use name-calling. Rush Limbaugh has never called anyone a name in his entire life.
Now how about going out and doing some work instead of playing with your computer since MY tax dollars pay YOUR salary—and I’m not getting my money’s worth.
WOW! I didn’t have you pegged as a Limbaugh listener. Boy was I way off. Are you a subscriber??
Mrs. Meister
Don’t people here learn? Blindly and naively placing so much faith, hope and expectations in one person. A politician no less? You will all be disappointed because you’re choosing between 2 faces of the same dirty coin.
At any rate America will continue to circle the drain. It’s time for the rise of new nations in the sun. It happens all the time. Spain, France, England… accept it.
“Blindly and naively placing so much faith, hope and expectations in one person. ”
Laurent, you are the one being presumptuous to assume you know any of us this well.
Speaking for myself, I don’t have faith in any politician. None of them are the answer to the world’s problems. Which are many, in America and all around. America has had some great men leading and some real losers, and I am sure we’d disagree on which is which.
You continue to put America down, but dude, I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. And I have many friends from all over the world that agree. Friends from Australia, Korea, Japan, Nigeria, Trinidad, Jamaica, the Philippines, England, and yes, Mexico.
I understand why we’re all here, to commiserate on LOST, but for you, if “TV Americain” sucks so bad, why do YOU spend so much time watching it? My friend who moved over from England just 3 years ago told me that everyone in England, at least in her circle of friends, couldn’t get enough “TV Americain”. It certainly beats dry British humor.
For the most part, I stay away from your comments. Not out of intimidation, cause well, we Americans don’t intimidate easily, but because your French winy BS is just beyond and beneath my efforts. You are the one who blindly and naively HATES America, and I feel sorry for you.
Mrs. Meister
I think Americans (that being the power-wielding plutocracy) do intimidate much too easily. Perhaps you need to reevaluate your language. At the very least learn the correct usage of intimidate.
But what should I expect from a woman who uses the word “dude”?
Thirdly, your incoherent screed somehow manages to give evidence to your confusion of this site. A site where one can watch a horrible TV program, albeit one from an infinite pool, and then tear it to shreds. My tearing you to shreds only demonstrates how horrible this show is. It’s beneath discussion, and you’re standing on its back.
I can always count on you to subtract from human intelligence every time you try to add something by fingertips to keyboard.
Will Janus’s façade retort?
Dear Dudey-Dude Laurent Dude,
Dude, you need to chill dude. Stop showing how much of moron you are dude. You, like, obviously could not retort the substance of her points, dude, so you, like reduced yourself to name calling and picking at here use of language. Dude, you are weak and pathetic. Post an argument if you have one, dude.
Later Laurent Dude
Mr. Dude Meister, the Mrs. Dude’s husband
Another brilliant post from the second half of the lmeister clan. Isn’t it sad when cousins marry?
I don’t know, why not ask your mother?
Mrs. Meister
I don’t have a mother. Me and my daddy use yours.
Isn’t that like saying you do your mother? You are one sick puppy!
Mrs. Meister
Since your mother isn’t related to me, my “doing her” does not make me a sick puppy. I guess that’s hard for you to understand since all your family members “do” each other.
I guess you came from a test tube. THAT explains a lot.
Mrs. Meister
No, my mother has passed away. That’s why I don’t have one.
And what is wrong with test tube babies? Are you against in vitro fertilization because your favorite TV preacher said it was the devil’s work? Or maybe your daddy/brother doesn’t like it. Regardless, I’m done with you. Your chattering has become tiresome.
I don’t watch TV Preachers dude, I just believe in making babies the old fashioned way., and it was a J-O-K-E.
Are you actually gonna play the ‘offended’ card here.
Mrs. Meister
My usage of intimidate is correct.
Incoherent? Everything I said was coherent if you have the ability to read. I just had my six year old read it and she understood what I wrote. Perhaps you need to go back to first grade. Maybe then you will have the ability to comprehend what I wrote.
And “tearing me to shreds”. Oh, boo hoo, Laurent said me not intelligent. Please Laurent, you are acting like a boob. Or, perhaps you are not acting at all.
Later Dude,
Mrs. Meister
ok, One for Laurent, I reread what I wrote, and I should have better stated that,
“we Americans are not easily intimidated.”
Happy?
Mrs. Meister
Shouldn’t you be doing the laundry or ironing or sweeping the floor or washing the dishes? It would be a much better use of your obviously limited intelligence.
And I enjoyed your typical conservative Republican response. Attack, attack, attack; realize that your opponent was right all along; scurry away with your tail between your legs; remain incredibly bitter and angry. Nice life you’ve carved out for yourself.
All the housework is done, but thanks for your concern.
Attack? That was Laurent attacking America…over and over and over again. Or can you not read?
“My opponent right all along? “I hardly think so. Perhaps you are just as anti-American as Laurent, to which I guess that is your prerogative. And before anyone accuses me of calling someone anti-American just cause they’re a liberal or a democrat or whatever you want to call them, that isn’t what I said. LAURENT IS ANTI-AMERICAN, his writing proves it and I think he would say it himself if you need him to be so blunt.
…and my proverbial tail is not between my legs. See, unlike you I can admit if I have made a mistake. Which is all I did. Not to my context, just to the usage of intimidate.
I am not biter or angry. You see, Vice, there are many opposing political views on this site. We have all been there before. If I was that thinned skinned, I’d have been gone long before. The truth is, Laurent just irritates me and usually I ignor him, but today, well I wanted to have a little fun. So, you couldn’t be more wrong. I’m not biter and angry, Au contraire, mon freur! I am having some fun, apparently at your expense.
My life is good.
Mrs. Meister
So you can bait Laurent, but neither Laurent nor I can bait you? I’ll file that away for future reference.
Now go make me dinner.
BTW, what the hell is “thinned-skinned”? Are there no dictionaries in your trailer park?
Boy, you are nit-picky, but you made me laugh.
THIN SKINNED.
Mrs. Meister
Golly gee Beav, looks like Laurent is on the warpath. Not to fear, the French always keep a white flag handy. Laurent, you should work on your English, but then again it’s lucky you aren’t speaking German now. You should be kissing our asses on a daily basis, but not to fear next time a ruthless dictator threatens France, we won’t stand in their way and insult your countries ability to defend itself. Fous le camp, Laurent, fous le camp.
I think we ought to take it easy on the French. After all, without Lafayette, we’d be drinking tea every afternoon, right? Also, this surrender thing: first, they had 100,000 killed in six weeks before surrendering to the Germans (we lost 400,000 in four years) with no one helping them (the Brits got their asses chased back across the Channel and we didn’t even enter the war for another year and a half); secondly, let’s not forget, our flags were just as white at Corregidor, Wake Island, and Guam. And everyone living below the Mason-Dixon line knows something about surrender, too.
But let’s talk about LOST! Didn’t Kate surrender to Sawyer? Will she surrender to Jack? More importantly, will Locke surrender to Ben? He’s seems to be giving it free right now.
Dear Prometheus,
it would be a lot easier to take it easy on the French, if Laurent wasn’t such an America basher. He starts it and usually remains unchallenged, but sometimes…
well, sometimes you just have to give him the boot, right up his, well .. you know.
And, Vice-Man, he just stepped in the line of fire and made himself a target with all his insults. He should have stayed on the porch.
Mrs. Meister
Going back to the “little joke” that started all of this, I’d suggest that supporters of McCain drive ten miles under the speed limit, with their right turn signal always blinking.
Now see, THAT was funny.
Kudos to Sean who can apparently take a joke and respond accordingly.
Mrs. Meister
Prometheus,
I liken discussing history to fanboys watching lost. They don’t want the truth, they just like going through the comfortable motions of denials.
Still, very good post. But real history has too many shades of gray to be interesting, black-white-right-wrong is so much more fun!
What, it ends here? I was looking forward to reading more of that argument.
Yeah, then we could start a site dedicated to how this site has gone downhill.
On a different note, I am listening to the score to Season 1 at work right now…… and man, was the music vastly, vastly, vastly superior to what they are pumping out today.
Zitch , I could not agree with you more. Your absolutely correct. It was vastly superior then as opposed to now. There really isn’t even a need to compare.
lol…that was supposed to be a joke poking fun at the fact that your arguments are getting dumber and dumber to the point somone would argue about somthing as pointless as the music selection and it totally went over your head.
let me point this in a way you all will understand:
“kungratyoulaysions your stupidity is unmatchable”
damn this place is blowin up. Preevyet said we haven’t been attacked since 9/11… but who attacked us on 9/11? how about somebody just come out and say it, 9/11 was an INSIDE JOB and there was prior knowledge! yes it happened on Bush’s watch because he and cheney made it happen. There is too much evidence out there that is not being publicized that makes me think it was an inside job. if the pentagon was really hit by an airplane, just show us the damn tape. how the hell did building 7 collapse without being hit? just happened to be an important government building, thats quite a coincidence. how much money has bush and cheney made off the war with their no-bid contracts? who really had to gain from the war? why was there no indepent investigation? why was the 9/11 commission hand picked by the bush administration? the list goes on.. why are these questions never asked or answered? why are the people who ask these questions always demonized and labeled anti-american? fuck no i don’t support a war that has costed us billions of dollars and over 4000 american lives, and 10s of thousands of innocent Iraqi lives.
preev and lmeister.. you guys think that bush and the republican party is the greatest thing to happen to america? forget the fact that bush’s grandfather Prescot Bush did business with the Nazis to make their family fortune, look at the condition of america in the last 7 years. people have no health care, education is going to shit, home foreclosures and gas prices are at a record high, the dollar is at record low and yet bushs only concern is Iraqi freedom?! freedom from their oil I say, and gaining a strategic stronghold on the last oil reserves of the world. you dare call people like us anti-american? i love this country and it pains me to see it go down the shit hole and not have others speak out against the crimes of our leaders.
bush is the worst thing that has happened to america.. think about this, your beloved president is a billionaire oil tycoon, and yet when he came to office, he increased his salary by $100,000. What the hell is a hundred grand to a billionaire? thats the kind of man you are supporting, and self serving dog that will do anything to increase his personal wealth at the cost of this great country and its great citizens.
OMG, a conspiracy nut! Oh you are correct, nevermind the hundreds of witnesses to the contrary of your argument. Yep, I think Dick Cheney paid the 15 hijackers himself through a subsidiary corporation of Haliburton, which in turn became the largest government contractor in Iraq. Try to stop believing things you see on the internet, for God’s sake, no one tells the truth here! I say I am a Captain in the US Army, but how do you know? I could be lying to garner sympathy. These conspiracy nuts claim things that are half true, I for one have seen the infamous video and you know what? It clearly shows a plane slamming into the pentagon. Did Bush know something? How could he know some islamic nutbags were going to hijack 4 planes and commit suicide? Of course, if we’re pointing fingers why didn’t Billy Boy Klinton take them out when he had the chance? Too busy being blown in the oral office to make a decision. Before you cast stones, be sure you know facts. The fact is they attacked us several times while Klinton was in office (World Trade Center in 1993, Khobar Towers, USS Cole, Embassy Bombings) and he did NOTHING, so they pressed on until they found a vulnerability and attacked it on 9-11.
Bush didn’t raise his salary, by constitutional law a sitting president can’t do that, it was Klinton who raised the presidential salary. I could refute all your lame accusations, but why rehash what anyone with a brain already knows? Just keep thinking it’s all Bush’s fault then who are you going to blame when Klinton II or Hussein gets into office and gas hits $5 a gallon and we’re still at war in Iraq?
bullshit.. you didn’t see any video of a plane crash because there was no plane crash. and if you did see it, then why hasn’t anyone else in general public? there was no debris of plane parts or anything else in to indicate a plane crash. i love how when anybody says anything contrary to the official explanation they are deemed a “conspiracy nut”. If i see just one solid peice of evidence to support the official theroy, i would be open to believing it.
if you truly believe what the government is feeding you and feel its the right course of action, than great, keep on doing what you’re doing and fight for their cause. i on the other hand will believe what i believe until so called conspiracies are disproved with cold hard facts and evidence
You see ‘american citizen’ you are wrong. Where have I claimed to be a Bush supporter? Where have I ever called someone anti-American for being against the war? You won’t be able to find it, because I didn’t say it, and I didn’t say it because that isn’t what I believe.
The truth is, I told a little joke. A joke that should have been taken lightly. For the most part it was. The trouble started coming in when dealing with Laurent, and then Vice. But what you are not realizing is Laurent isn’t a friend to Liberals or Conservatives in this country. HE HATES AMERICANS. He cuts on Americans. He makes fun of them, belittles our country, our culture, and anything else he feels like sliding in. He is annoying and the attack was on Laurent and his anti-American crap. So don’t feel that I think you are anti-American just because you are a democrat, assuming that you are. I certainly do not think Bush is the greatest thing to happen to this country. So lighten up. If you love your country, then you really don’t disagree with me where Laurent is concerned.
So lighten up, and don’t forget to turn your lights off.
Mrs. Meister
i apologize if i misunderstood you, but I am so frustrated at life here because i, just like many others are regular blue-collar people struggling to make ends meet. never has there been a more difficult time to survive in the united states if you’re not making 6 figures. i blame that on the current administration.
youtube / user / RKOwens4
chew on that, conspiracy theorists
The one thing that always bothered me about 9/11 was that there were several news reports that witnesses reported a “small plane” had crashed into the Pentagon in the early moments after it was hit. Now I always take eyewitness testimony with several grains of salt, but I’ve never been able to understand how a number of people could have mistaken a passenger jet for a small plane. With what was going on that day, you’d think they would be prone to exaggerate if anything, and call it a jumbo jet. That bothers me.
It was a small jet. If you look at the link above, there is a video dedicated to what you’re talking about, and it includes numberous photos of commercial jet parts in the rubble surrounding the pentagon, which is completely contrary to popular belief that “no wreckage was found.” Funny how BS snowballs.
“Surrender”- Check!
“Speaking German”- Check!
“Should be kissing our ass”- Check!
“White flag”- Check!
Yawn.
Never had the rare, um… ‘exposure to’ debate with GED earners and junior college dropouts before. These web-based boards ensure a democratic forum, and are rather egalitarian in that aspect… lamentably.
Now I know why Bill Gates needs so many H1-B visas! The amount of stupidity around here is staggering.
By the way, how DOES one manage to argue with oneself for the better part of a day?
Really!
Here’s one from your ‘Arguing for Dummies’ playbook:
“Get a life”- Check!
I always laugh when i read comments from americans praising Bush and his war machine for ensuring Americans of their freedom – because apparently without him the US (and the world) would be overrun by terrorists. Uh yeah the big bad arabs are out to get you! I bet people like preevyet check under their beds every night to make sure there isn’t a terrorist there.
I guess when you watch enough fox news, bill o’reilly, and other idiots on tv everyday, you too would start to believe that everyone is out to get you. oh no iran is out to get us! oh no so too is korea and china!! It’s funny how an apparent superpower has its own citizens living in fear and paranoia.
As for the whole World War 2 stuff – why do Americans always act like they single handedly won the war? They act as if Britain and the other allies were just standing around twiddling their thumbs. All the US did was add that little extra push to get the allies over the top. If it wasn’t for key russian victories on the eastern front then it would have gone on much longer.
but i’m sure your textbooks, and news media will tell you otherwise so believe what you will yankees.
btw don’t forget to look under your beds before going to sleep! someone might be out to get you!
I don’t need to check since Bush has made this country safer with his policies.
And I will reiterate that the US was not the sole victor in WWII, and the Candadians were at Normandy along with a couple other allies lest we forget. Yes, we gave a needed push, but had we not intervened, Hitler would have overrun all of Europe. Russian wins were key, but having them keep fighting win or lose distracted the Germans just enough to win it for the Allies.
Laurent, I can’t speak for the rest of the GED crowd, but I have a Masters in Computer systems management and a bachelors in Mathematics. I have qualified for MENSA and carry a 165ish IQ, but arguing with frogs on here has lowered that a touch I’m sure.
MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!!!
STOP WITH THE POLITICAL SHIT!!!
THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE “WHY LOST SUCKS”!!!!! YOU MOTHER FUCKERS HAVE HIJACKED IT WITH YOUR LEFT/RIGHT BULLSHIT!!!!
SO GUESS WHAT!?!?! NOW…..
YYY YYY OOOO UU UU
YY YY O O UU UU
YYY O O UU UU
YYY O O UU UU
YYY OOOO UUUUUU
SSSSSSS UU UU CCCCCCC KK KKK
SS UU UU CC KK KK
SSSSSSS UU UU CC KK KKK
SS UU UU CC KK KK
SSSSSSS UUUUUU CCCCCCCC KK KKK
GO FUCK YOURSELVES!!!! MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!
/rant off
/caps off
/fuck off
Look, there was only like 50 comments when the political crap started and it was already the end of the week. LOST conversation was lacking because the regulars and even fanboys don’t really have much to say.
So, we spiced it up a little. And we did a better, more entertaining job than your infantile, yet vulgar rant.
Mrs. Meister
You guys deserved it. Period.
whatever Doc. LOVE
Mrs. Meister
XOXOXOXOXO sweetie!
-Dr. Love
Mrs. Meister
lol. Thanks for parsing out the spaces on my post! That SUCKS too!
In case it doesn’t seem obvious
YOU SUCK!
I hope you guys caught my drift.
jeebiz mary and yoda….
Wow! I go away for a few days and the whole site goes political. We need a really bad episode tonight so that we can all channel our anger to a much more deserving target.
Fortunately, next up is a Jack/Kate/Botox story, so I’m guessing there’ll be lots to complain about.
An emergency appendectomy!?!? Sister Mary Francis….
We may need to invent a new Lost Suck-o-meter scale because I’m fairly certain tonight’s episode will shoot the mercury through the roof.
Yeah, well I will be leaving soon to go on an (extended) weekend camping trip so I will be watching the suckfest with L under the stars around a campfire. I’ll check y’all out Sunday afternoon when I get back.
Have fun,
Mrs. Meister
This political shit is really really tiring, and part of the reason I hardly use the Internets(TM) or watch TV anymore.
Let’s get back to calling people moron fanboys and talking about why I liked Lost in the first place– which was that it was this wonderful show that wasn’t about politics or Kiefer Sutherland saving the world with a cell phone and a 9MM. And how that show with so much promise got turned into a sack of drivel that retarded people like.
This political shit is really really tiring, and part of the reason I hardly use the Internets(TM) or watch TV anymore.
Let’s get back to calling people moron fanboys and talking about why I liked Lost in the first place– which was that it was this wonderful show that wasn’t about politics or Kiefer Sutherland saving the world with a cell phone and a 9MM. And how that show with so much promise got turned into a sack of drivel that retarded people like.
Your just part of the vast right wing conspiracy aren’t you? Bush lover. I do apologize but as a member of the greatest Army in the world (Kiss Army notwithstanding) I feel compelled to defend our great countries honor.